August 7th, 2008

Current Music: Thump. Subject: The Pinch. The Pulse. Time: 06:57 pm Current Mood: distressed

Inevitably each day will pass. However the negativity won't subside. A predicament is still a predicament. Time can't change that. Things have to get worse before they can get better? How many cliches.... I'm discouraged. Completely. I'm not sure how or why these things have happened... Or what exactly I have done to deserve such a treatment. Must have done something.

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July 10th, 2008

Current Music: Homecoming-The Teenagers Current Location: Hell House Subject: Riddled with someone elses angst Time: 06:26 pm Current Mood: annoyed

Ignore them. Hit them with the nearest end table. Ignore them? How ridiculous. I'm so mean. Yes. Yes I am. Go call your boyfriend. The only one who cares. You're hungry. Child.

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July 4th, 2008

Current Music: Nude-Radiohead Subject: Like a boy of summer...Not likely. Time: 05:25 pm Current Mood: crushed

Feeling empty, lonely, lost, forgotten. How is it that I have no friends.. I've managed to lose all the ones I thought mattered. Key word. Thought. I don't know. Fourth of July...I'm at home, watching a baby. Feeling... Disappointed.

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July 1st, 2008

Current Music: my brain whirring Subject: Bowls are Round Time: 04:24 pm Current Mood: oh you know.

I feel a little stung. It could be due to the recent upsurge in hormones... But stung, nonetheless. I know I can fix it. But I didn't break it.

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June 25th, 2008

Current Music: Fools-Dodos Current Location: Where? Subject: Give Time: 07:18 pm Current Mood: frustrated

No you're never coming back. Every day is an obstacle. I think I am losing myself more and more. So many things have to change. I'm just..stuck. Again. And again. It'd be nice to have someone to talk to.

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June 15th, 2008

Current Music: How deep is your love-the bird and the bee Subject: You make my love come down. Time: 11:35 pm Current Mood: fresh out of ideas

Oh you make my love. come down. What do women really want? Is it really your own decision? Or decided for you by some unseen force, long before you were just a blip in your drunken mothers eye? Does someone already know what you are going to do, when you are going to do it? Like if you make a big mistake early on, does that shape the rest of your life. Karma? God? Confused. I tell myself I want one thing, and then I find myself thinking about another, and maybe wanting something totally different. I perceive my problem to be..that I just want.

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April 6th, 2008

Subject: Unknowh Helmsman Time: 03:51 pm Current Mood: annoyed

Seriously. SERIOUSLY. I'm slightly frustrated right now. It's like being surrounded by a swarm of gnats. On the up and up, Flight of the Conchords are going to be in ANN ARBOR. Fucking yeah. That floats my boat for sure.

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March 8th, 2008

Current Music: Back in your head-Tegan and Sara Subject: Return Time: 05:22 pm Current Mood: discontent

I've decided to come back, if only for a little while. I'd like to say that presently, I am in a funk. I seem to be reading things wrong, misinterepreting people and life... And let me tell you. I get shot in the ass for it. My mood fluctuates...two weeks ago it was good. Really good. Now it's just...like a ship of frustration... I'm not sailing it. Some other fuckers are. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. My sister brought her boyfriend over. he's chubby. hahahahha

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September 25th, 2006

Current Music: staring at the sun- tv on the radio Subject: Outlet Time: 05:00 am Current Mood: enraged

I AM SO ANGRY AND UPSET...I WANT TO CUT OFF MY LEG AND HIT PEOPLE WITH IT. I WISH I WAS JOKING. SO NOT.......THIS IS SOME BULL SHIT...OH MY GOD. ok it probably is not as bad as all capital letters make it out to be....but i am seriously distressed and going hurt someone.

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May 18th, 2006

Current Music: pioneers-bloc party Current Location: your moms house Subject: banana flavored love substitute Time: 10:43 am Current Mood: hungry

I am leaving in a n hour to go to kentucky, whre my mother has recently relocated. we have a good trip planned. I am going to watch the oc tonight. lol. On saturday we are driving to nashville to see imogen heap. this morning i woke up and i am bleeding like a war casualty..um..did before he came a casualty? yeah. uh lets see....I am hungry...god its hard to write things down lol. last night i went out with the girls to the grand coney which has become the usual hangout. after we left i expressed interest in how i would like to liberate a lawn gnome and have him be in all my photographs during my vacation. i had an image of me and a gnome standing in front of the worlds smallest church..his eyes twinkling in the sunlight...lol. definitley tourists, we are. so my dear friend stashia whoi is pregnant mind you, decided it would be a good idea to :liberate" said gnome...so we rode around to find a suitable candidtate...and we did. there were two of them, sitting on someones front porch. the porch light was on and all the lights in the house werwe on. but stashia still went in and grabbed it. it was pretty great, albeit juvenile. but suck my cock. so thats about it. work is way gay. but its ok because i have daria. she cracks me up..and i am her favorite, but dont tell anyone. peace out to anyone who still readds this even though my last post was two months ago..stuart and i have quite the trip ahead of us.

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March 14th, 2006

Current Music: you only live once-the strokes Subject: In the middle of a putting green Time: 04:01 pm Current Mood: amused

My mom is harping again. She won't stop this constant incessant droning. She says that if I move to tennessee, she will pay off all of my bills, I can live rent free in her house, and when I finsih school she will personally move me to seattle. I told her I had a fear of southern accents. She told me that I had to decide within two weeks. whatever. I obviously am not going to just pick up and move. although sometimes i find myself wondering, why not? but then i realize, i just dont want to, thats why...because i have So much going on here. ha ha ha. i mean my god. i have the best friends a girl could ask for(half true) the hottest boyfriend a girl could ask for(in my mind) the greatest job(not so much)and um..well i have cute shoes. (this is true) sigh.

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February 27th, 2006

Current Music: breathe me-sia Subject: laaaaaaaaaaaa Time: 10:16 pm Current Mood: crazy

myspace me! www.myspace.com/islandhopper21

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February 23rd, 2006

Current Music: knives out-radiohead Subject: Can life get any better? I submit that it cannot! Time: 03:47 pm Current Mood: lasagna...mmm

So, just in case anyone was wondering, and i am sure that not many of you are, here is an update lol- -I had three indecent proposals at work today from mike drew and dan involving illegimate love children hot tubs and dirty talk...hahahah -My grandpa has pancreatic cancer -I am doing pretty well -i got a raise woo hoo... -i am decididng between bonnaroo and lollapalooza for the summer time -i am most likely going to go to tennessee this april to see my brother on his birthday... -it is almost flip flop weather time so excited -i have been hanging out with my coworkers a lot more and it rocks. -however, simone and i got in to a HUGE fight on saturday..lol we kissed and made up...ryan was like oh i wish i could have seen that. -oh and i found out i am jaynes favorite...oh well im quitting anyway -and this is sick...i think that mike and i have...GASP sexual gross eww tension...maybe thats not it i dont know lol he is repulsive but hey. - guess thats it

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February 2nd, 2006

Current Music: blackout-lovedrug Subject: hmmm... Time: 08:57 pm Current Mood: hi!

Isn't it amazing how the oc can take you away for an hour? It is quite awesome.

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January 29th, 2006

Current Music: these things-she wants revenge Subject: i missed it.. Time: 08:23 pm Current Mood: lifes a train that ran me over

inside my head is a greyhound station it takes my thoughts to far off destinations

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January 19th, 2006

Current Music: Sometimes the sun-the lashes Subject: No No Not Ever. Time: 03:48 pm Current Mood: for now of course..

Today Drew said something really gross about me and mike. vom-it. lets just say it involves a bearskin rug and bringing the heat. oh gross. The question of the day is why is it so expensive to be a girl? I mean come on the shit we buy adds up. However, there was this purse that i had wanted since like the beginning of november, but it was seventy dollars. I could have spent that...but i couldnt bring myself to do it...then today as i was walking by looking at all the sales inside...i saw it on sale for ten dollars. hell yeah io bought it. i should have bought it in every fucking color too... On Saturday, I am going to Lansing with some buddies. Hit urban outfitters, cheeseburger in paradise, a club or two...good times. I was at fridays a couple of days ago, hanging out and whatnot, and i geta text message, wel li had been texting someone else, so i thought they were replying..but no it was the most random freaking thing ever...my friends alyssa was at a bar or something and she wanted to go but i couldnt. mary was my server and i like her service. lol that was funny sounding. ohmygoodness i think i am going to go to a very kick ass concert in march, and one in april possibly. more details on that later.. I am supposed to be meeting this boy that someone thinks i will like, but when she described him to me by asking, "Do you think ricky martin is cute"? i have my doubts. Yesterday I was looking for a note pad to make a list of things i needed to get at the store, and i stumbled upon one that i wrote like 15 pages on, about something that happened that just caused me to apparently freak out like crazy and start crying. I really dont remember doing so...It was weird. (It was something thatone of my friends did, that they had always been doing but i finally snapped) and this was before my birthday...i read it and it was like i was reading it from someone elses point of view,...i was like man, thats shitty. lol what a bitch. so yeah...i threw it away because honestly shit like that is useless...i love not having to argue and fight with bitches over ridiculious things. its miraculous. girls are so fricken catty...and im not denying that i have those tendencies...every once in a great while mind you.. My haircolor is fading. something must be done. New OC on tonight!!! Tivo it!!! I will be.

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January 12th, 2006

Subject: I am going to be... Time: 05:38 pm Current Mood: i shouldnt but i will

High as a kite on Saturday.

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Current Music: One horse town-the thrills Subject: Unboyfriendable Time: 04:47 pm Current Mood: curious

I worked like a indonesian kid in a sweatshop today. Isnt that a refreshing thought. Whats refreshing is this weather though. Its fabulous. Almost flip-flop weather. Screw it I can make it flip flop weather hahaha. So today I had what I like to call "cabin fever". I totally didnt want to do anything today I just wanted to be at a beach or something somewhere else. And now, everyday I find myself thinking of living in Seattle. I seriously want to go there so bad. I think I am going to go there. I need to get out of this one horse town. Can I consider this a one horse town? That is the question. I just feel the need to relocate. Make new friends, that sort of thing. probably won't ever happen considering my financial situation. I am going to have bad luck, I mean bad credit for seven years. well hey same fucking difference. Note to self-when, upon meeting a deliciously sexy man in a chateau in france, (who happens to be a doctor, the man not the chateau....?)do not say:"So, I am in the reproductive stage in my life right now so if that's where your goals are, I'm here." (and smile) Actually, just don't say that to a guy period. I know, Im smart as hell. I haven't drank in a couple weeks. why is that? oh, the poor thing. would it be wrong to use my 5 dollar meijer gift card i got at bread bash towards liquor? Please don't respond to that by sending me pamphlets from AA and Betty Ford.

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January 10th, 2006

Current Music: Wait-Ben Kweller Subject: Praying for love in a lapdance, and paying in naivety Time: 05:30 pm Current Mood: blah blah effing blah

So in case anyone was wondering, no, I didn't get fired. But if i would have, I would have crawled into a hole and never called anyone of you again. Well, I don't call half of you anyway. hahahha. except you jackie..cuz youre special hahahahha lolololol enjoy italy my friend and bring me back some italian sausage. and i dont mean the food.............i am so fucking hilarious. anyways....I can never be on a register ever again, and i cant be transfered, and i cant get a raise...and greg wants me to pay the company back...he can go to hell. jayne is real pissed because she wants me to be a shift...like i would do that anyways..hell no...lalallala oh my credit card is in collections thats fabulous...so i am really thinking of picking up, asking my grandma for money, the one on my moms side, and starting over in seattle. im not like depressed or anything i just need to get out of this city. i have like add of grandrapids or something its making me crazy. screw tennesee my mom pisses me off.

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January 3rd, 2006

Current Music: cold wind-the arcade fire Subject: Love, the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket Time: 05:14 pm Current Mood: nervous as hell

Im going to be fired tomorrow. and if i dont, then yay. but greg and i are going to have a talk and he scares the shit out of me. i dont know what happened to the 200 dollars greg. suck my cock. bleh. new years was ok. if i get fired, you will be able to find me at bennigans...with a shit load of food in front ogf me.

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